Well it has been a long journey and still nothing.... It sucks but what can I say I am to my breaking point and just past the point of baby crazy! We have been trying for a child for 3 years 2 months and 6 days now. A year passed by so I went to the doctor and he does blood work etc. He then tells me nothing is wrong. So another year and a half went by. I was still have irregular periods and it just sucked! I ended up the emergency room one night in bad pain and talked with the doctor there and he gave me provera to bring on my period something I had not had in almost 6 months! Well provera was taken and 14 days later here come my period and it was awful! I finally went back to my doc and they ran more tests and did and ultrasound and bam found out that I had been right all along. I have PCOS. I wish I had known this all along instead of wasting my time and energy of trying on my own. So now with no insurance and hardly any money we are taking a break. This kills me because well I want a baby so bad but I also want to be able to provide a good and healthy life for our child that we bring into the world when and if that ever happens for us. I just get so sick and tired of reading on facebook or seeing those people out who don't want kids with kids and pregnant again! All these people who didn't plan for kids getting pregnant at a drop of a hat and then there is me and so many other women who have infertility issues who are trying so hard and would give anything for a baby who still have nothing. I know I sound selfish but its so hard to stay positive and happy all the time. But I do my best. I know it will happen when God is ready for us to have our turn but I am tired of waiting. I just thought for sure when my husband and I said I do and we decided to start trying it would be as simple as stopping with the birth control pill and a few months even possibly weeks and I would be pregnant. Boy was I wrong! I have learned so many things about my body on this journey and I continue to learn more and more every day! For now we are taking a break to let my husband go back to school to get his welding diploma so that in hopes he can get a better job with benefits to help us with when we go back to trying! Because trying without a doctor is hard and makes it alot more difficult then one would think! I am currently on 2000 mg of metformin a day. I was having periods every month for 6 months straight and this month it has gone back to not coming!? I don't understand and its driving me crazy!? Well its Christmas Eve and I need to get to bed so that I can get up and do the laundry and get things ready for Christmas dinner with my grandparents and then on Christmas I get to go to my dad's house for Christmas! I wish all of you out there Happy Holidays! I pray that 2011 brings on many new things for me! I have lost my grandmother Nancy this year and its been very tough for me on top of learning that I have PCOS and just everything just seems to be getting worse by the minute..... I just don't think I can stand being in 2010 anymore! Come on 2011 and I pray that you bring on a new job, weight loss for me, periods, and best of all a baby for myself!
Night and Merry Christmas!!!
